THE tears flowed freely as Crystal Palace's dejected players trudged off the field of their Carling Cup semi-final second-leg against Cardiff City a beaten side.

Penalties are always the cruellest way to go out, far worse with a place in the final at stake.

And emotions overflowed when Jonathan Parr ballooned the fourth spot-kick over the bar to send the home team into delirium and the Eagles to their knees.

There were tears from a distraught Paddy McCarthy, whose dismissal late in normal time meant the Eagles would play more than 40 minutes with 10 men.

Up in the stands, many fans finally broke down, their dreams shattered in the cruellest fashion. There would be no place in the final, no day at Wembley.

But among the despair that engulfed one corner of the Cardiff City Stadium there were tears of a different kind – of pride.

Pride in a side who had upset the odds and form book time and again just to reach this stage, pride in a team that had shown no fear to conquer mighty Manchester United, champions of England, in their own back yard, in the previous round.

Pride in their players who had battled so bravely on the night – playing all of extra time a man light after their captain was sent off – and pride in a manager who in just over 12 months has turned the club's fortunes around and returned hope to Selhurst Park.

Defeat ended a tremendous run that had seen them beat Crawley Town, Middlesbrough, Southampton, Wigan and, most memorably, Manchester United.

The hostile atmosphere of a packed stadium was always going to be the toughest assignment of them all as the talented young team headed to Wales desperate to cling on to their first leg lead. It proved a bridge too far.

Anthony Gardner's own goal after seven minutes condemned the Eagles to a 1-0 defeat on the night. With no further goals in normal or extra-time, the match was decided by spot-kicks.

Jermaine Easter, Sean Scannell and the unfortunate Parr all missed from the spot as the hosts booked a place in the competition's showpiece Wembley final.

While injuries and flu bugs had dominated the talk in the build-up to the first game, Freedman had freely admitted to having no such problems ahead of the second-leg, with only Wales U21 international Jonathan Williams missing.

And, having rested his entire starting line-up at Blackpool on Saturday, Freedman was taking no chances for a fixture which the fledgling boss had argued ranked among the most important in the South London club's history.

Julian Speroni, Mile Jedinak, Wilfried Zaha and Glenn Murray all returned, while, crucially, the fully recovered Nathaniel Clyne was available for the first time since January 2.

For a game of this magnitude his return at right-back was most welcome, despite the host of scouts from Premier League clubs who made a note of the in-demand right-back's every touch.

It was still predictable that, in such a cauldron of noise, the hosts started positively and had an early shout for a penalty when Craig Conway went down in the box under pressure from Jonathan Parr but their appeals were rejected by referee Howard Webb. Replays showed it was the correct decision and that the Cardiff midfielder was perhaps fortunate not to go into the book for a dive.

The Eagles' tactics were clearly to keep things tight at the back and hit the Bluebirds on the break whenever possible, but that game-plan was dealt a severe blow as they fell behind early on. Gardner, who had scored the winner in the first game, put the ball in the wrong net as he deflected Conway's flashing cross beyond Speroni into his own net.

It was important that, with the scores still level on aggregate, Palace did not capitulate. They needed their goalkeeper to be at his breath-taking best to deny Peter Whittingham when the midfielder unleashed a fierce shot. It powered through a crowd of players before Speroni parried to safety.

The game was being played at a frantic pace. Unfortunately for Palace, Cardiff looked the more threatening, with Aron Gunnarsson and Kenny Miller blasting over.

Palace began to have their moments, mostly through Zaha on the left. The 19-year-old, a constant threat breaking at pace, drew two fouls in quick succession, Darcy Blake booked for a particularly nasty lunge. The Eagles had a good shout for a penalty when Chris Martin looked to have been dragged to the floor by Gunnarsson as he attacked Ambrose's free-kick but Webb, perfectly placed, waved the appeals away.

Cardiff, surging forward in great numbers, ought to have been further ahead by the interval. Miller twice came within inches of doubling the lead.

First the Scotland striker dragged his shot wide of the left post after he had beaten Speroni to Conway's through ball. Then in first half injury-time he came even closer, his shot on the turn striking the inside of the other post as he watched the ball flash across the line before Jedinak eventually hacked it away.

Palace started the second period strongly. Clyne burst down the right and whipped in a low ball. It was poked behind by Ben Turner before Murray could shoot. From the resulting corner McCarthy, unmarked, should have done better but spooned his header over.

McCarthy was booked for tripping Miller. Only Gardner's covering presence prevented the Palace skipper being the last man. Speroni tipped Whittingham's free-kick over the bar.

Moments later, the keeper horribly misjudged a cross and was beaten to the ball by Anthony Gerrard, but his looping header was hacked clear by McCarthy.

Freedman made his first change – Scannell for Martin. It almost had an instant impact. The Republic of Ireland U21 international burst forward into the area before finding Zaha on the overlap. Zaha lacked composure and flashed his shot wide.

Seconds later, McCarthy picked up his second yellow after clattering into the back of Miller. The centre-back left the field obviously distraught, fearing his error had cost his side their Wembley chance. Now short at the back, the Eagles replaced Ambrose with Paul McShane to batten down the hatches. City would have found the winner had Zaha, miraculously, not got back to fling himself in front of Cowie.

Palace looked drained at the prospect of extra-time, but Freedman dragged them over for a team talk right in front of the travelling fans as he attempted to rouse them for a gruelling half hour.

In first half extra-time, Cowie will feel he should have done better when he blasted substitute Filip Kiss's back-heel over the bar and Rudy Gestede tested Speroni with a stinging drive. In the second period, Kiss drilled a vicious shot onto the bar.

The sense it could be Palace's night was heightened when, in the last four minutes, Whittingham's deflected shot flew just wide and then Gunnarsson's crashing header hit the bar.

Even in penalties it was difficult to separate the teams. Miller and Easter both missed. But Craig Conway blasted home before Scannell had his effort saved. Advantage Cardiff. Kiss and Jedinak hit the target, before Whittingham sent Speroni the wrong way. Parr had to score, but skied his effort, leaving the home players the ones celebrating.