"My daughter blames me for her dad being stabbed to death"
EXCLUSIVE
by Aline Nassif
aline.nassif@essnmedia.co.uk
The mum of two of stabbed boxer John "King" Abbey's children says her young daughter is scarred by the home she associates with "daddy" - and is desperate to move out.
King's girlfriend Nadra says her life has gone from bad to worse in the months following the tragic day in January when she gave birth to son Adam but then heard his father had been killed.
While she is prepared to put aside her personal grief, she says she cannot ignore the wellbeing of her children Leyla, 4, and seven-month-old Adam.
Leyla, who witnessed her dad's death as they waited at a bus stop in London Road, West Croydon, is said to be in a perpetual state of anger and fear.
Nadra, who lives close to Norwood Junction, explained: "My daughter resents me because our home reminds her of King and he's never around.
"I am so afraid I'm losing her because she is always blaming me for not being there on the day he was killed.
"She says to me 'mummy, why weren't you there to protect me? Where is daddy? What have you done?'
"It breaks my heart. Everything I do is for my children, but Leyla is never happy."
Nadra has even changed the nursery her daughter attends in a bid to cut out the "bad vibes".
She said: "Nursery was another trigger - when I collected her she'd say to me 'all the other children still have their daddies fetch them but not me'.
"The new place is an extra two buses away, but I don't have an option."
The sight of anything related to King sets Leyla off.
Nadra explained: "The only time she isn't lashing out is when we are away from the things that remind her of King.
"I went to Sheffield three weeks ago with Leyla and Adam to visit my sister, and we were like a happy family again.
"Our place has too many memories. At first they were a comfort, but now they are torturing us.
"I'm not asking for a bigger house. I'm not asking for special treatment.
"I just want to live somewhere else in Croydon so my kids can have an easier childhood."
King, 26, had seen newborn Adam at 10am on January 29, when he and Leyla visited Mayday Hospital.
It was when he was on his way back to the hospital, about eight hours later, that he was stabbed to death.
Next month, Charles Acquaah, of Greenside Road , Croydon, will be tried for King's murder.
In response to Nadra's housing plea, a council spokeswoman said: "We have not been contacted by [Nadra] but in order for us to consider her for a move she would need to apply for a housing transfer.
"She can visit her district housing office where they will be able to discuss her circumstances and offer help and advice."
26 Comments
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by Dazzer, New Addington
Sunday, August 23 2009, 12:41AM
“All these words coming from a 4 year old?.....hardly - don't you think!!!
Remember..children only know what YOU tell them Nadra. You must learn to do your greiving away from the children...you are probably makings things worse for the children.
Yes, you went to Sheffield and things were brighter...perhaps you yourself had better things to think about.
Why would you still want to live in Croydon?...your daughter would still have the knowledge of where the attack happened wouldn't she?....and now you've gone and bought the newspapers into your home again...just to upset the children again!!
Boy and girl equals 3 bedroomed house (nice move if you can get it!!)
Yes, I understand what has happened is a tragedy - but you can't change the past - if you want your children to get over this then it is up to YOU.”
by Moony, Purley
Friday, August 21 2009, 12:53PM
“Hey Franc hows the car?
Oooh errr chase me, chase me!”
by Franc, webb estate
Thursday, August 20 2009, 10:37PM
“Give the Girl a chance to start a new life somewhere else.
I know how she feels, my wife died in May this year and the constant reminders break my heart. I'm thinking of moving out
to my villa full time to be with a Lady I met out there for a fresh start. We all deserve to be happy.
It must be terrible to have the little kid blaming her for the Dads murder. And don't forget that kid was forced to watch while her Dad was murdered.
And you can't take it out on the Mum for falling in love with a wrong un', she never knew he was fathering other kids.”
by Thadious Mcfarious, Dorset now
Thursday, August 20 2009, 4:09PM
“I brought my council house for £12,000 and sold it for £315,000 and moved far away from Croydon.”
by Anon, Anon
Thursday, August 20 2009, 2:58PM
“Hmmm - yes, in theory, people can buy their council homes. But the reality is that 60% of council tenants get their rent paid by us taxpayers. In monetary terms, this is worth £10 billion per year and equates to £476 per year for every privately owned home in Britain. These figures have just been published by the National Housing Federation. Disgusting! What a nation of lazy layabouts we have become. No wonder people like that useless waste of time John King Abbey breed like flies.”
by Mmmmmm, ...
Thursday, August 20 2009, 2:10PM
“Do you mean THEIR council home?”
by Mmmmm, ...
Thursday, August 20 2009, 2:09PM
“Do you THEIR council home?”
by hmmm, Anon
Thursday, August 20 2009, 1:21PM
“No you cant move when you feel like it..there is a long waiting list..can take years. And you have to have good grounds to move. And by the way, people can buy there council homes.”
by Del Boy, Peckham
Thursday, August 20 2009, 1:09PM
“Marsha you should know as the Webb is now the biggest council estate in Purley isn't it?
Full of the caravaning community.”
by Marsha De'Lacey, The Webb Estaste
Thursday, August 20 2009, 11:21AM
“Is this the benefit of having a council house? You get to move when ever you feel like it?
I wonder how different things would be if she owned the property?
5 kids by 3 different women? Oh my days, this man was a womaniser.
Very sad though.”